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  • Kelli Rae Wilson

where are the older women?

Where are the older women?

.....the women that the book of Titus speaks of?

Titus 2:3-5 "Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God."

While Millennials (1980+) and Generation Y & Z (1980-1996+) families are falling apart...literally, I can't help but wonder-where are all the parents and grandparents that are to be here giving advice and setting examples? I have watched grandparents and those who lie in the baby boomer generation and Generation X completely check-out. I am not speaking of personal issues here or family related experiences. I am speaking collectively to the body of believers. The body of Christ.

Why has retirement and "having your time now" become more important than inviting your children and grandchildren over for a Bible study (just like Anne Graham Lotz does with her grandchildren). How can grandparents babysit their grandkids day in-and-out and those kids still have never heard the gospel? Why is family prayer obsolete in the homes of so many grandparents that sit in pews each week on Sunday? In a world full of competition and empty advice, young mothers, daughters and precious young women would cling to the hard truth. Many young women would admire the chance to be given wise words by an older women, someone who has had the experience of the tests of life. Truth is getting lost in Love. Yes, it’s getting lost in love. The great command is love. But the even greater command is loving God first with sincere faith. My generation is longing for this sincere faith in God to be shown. Without true sincere faith, love is lost. We cannot know true love with-out knowing the Creator of love itself. We need this faith and love demonstrated. We need it to be told to us and shown to us.

I went to speak a while ago to a group of mother's and by surprise the audience was mostly grandparents. What I came to speak about was in-regards to child rearing per Biblical study and the simple failures and joys of mothering. I was anxious because I wondered why God allowed me to fall among women older than me. Women I felt were wiser than me and I am up here with this “mom message” worried they cannot relate to my message. Ironically, the message fit the mold for many grandparents. I was slightly worried and said Lord you know what you are doing here n this place. God reminded me of (2 Timothy 4:12). I had a huge awakening after the women approached me after the event. God is calling and seeking the older women right now to be motherly to the young mothers! We need them. We need the Godly generation who has lived a sincere faith and those who can show us what that looks like. The older women that Titus speaks of: matured in faith, reverent in living and "teaching what is good" is almost like an endangered species. It’s crucial now because we live in a world that has lost the truth. Godly mothering and submissiveness to our husbands it not something we see nor know how to fact, it's despised, it’s watered down and it’s rejected. We need the grandparent generation not to check-out and go enjoy their time now, we need them the most to get busy, dirty, and loose themselves in the training of younger men and women! We need them to lead, to shepherd, to guide, to reproof, to love, to rebuke, and to engage.....we need them to get lost in ministering to the younger generation.

I have a word to share…it needs to be said......

Women, if you walk with the Lord and your adult children do not walk with the Lord—- YOU ARE STILL CALLED to minister to the other young women around you. Your children who chose another lifestyle have no bearing on the ministry you are called to do today. Please, do not let the enemy hold you down in that insecurity. Rise-up and move in others lives. Do not grow weary in doing good.

One of the brightest hopes you have in knowing we need you is the story of Eli with Samuel. Hannah longed for a son and God gifted her and her husband Elkahana a son, his name was Samuel. The story is wonderful and sacrificial (1 Samuel 1). Hannah gave her son Samuel back to the Lord. When he was of age she sent him to Eli, a priest, for training and Godly equipping. However, Priest Eli’s own sons were called “sons of Belial,” or worthless men. Why? They did not know the Lord. Walking with the Lord is truly a choice. Even if our parents are saved and train us in the Lord, we still have a choice to either walk with Jesus or away from Him.

Eli's sons turned their back on their father's God. What was the result in their lives? They misused the offerings of the Lord, turning it into a way to satisfy their own lusts. Eli raised Samuel and chose to honor and bless Hannah as well. Especially when she came to visit and bring Samuel clothes she made him. Even though Eli’s own sons walked away from the Lord and did various sinful acts, Eli obeyed God and poured into Samuel’s life. Samuel’s heart was soft to the Lord. We see Samuel continuing to grow in stature and favor with God and man.

What if Eli felt inadequate? What if Eli said, “my own sons walked away from the Lord, so I am unworthy to disciple Samuel”? The ministry God had for Eli would be dead if Eli chose he wasn’t worthy of ministry. Minister means servant (in strong's Greek). We all are servants of the King.

The attitude of some of the retired Christians today is - “I have lived my hard life, now it’s time to enjoy a life of pleasure”. The Lord takes pleasure in our joy. He created us to enjoy His wonder and He even understands we need rest. But, what is more enjoyable than seeing someone walk in the Lord, especially, because we are vessels of His goodness? Eli could have missed a wonderful opportunity.

Eli could have ended up like another sad story…. King Solomon. King Solomon- who loved the Lord so greatly but as he got older he become less wise… weary of life and almost depressed....he says, “I enjoyed all these things in vanity, and now life is meaningless" (Ecclesiastes 1). It was meaningless because he was doing everything for himself and his ministry became of no value in his old age.

I write this blog to tell the “older” women. We need you. I need you. Our children need you. Don’t let the idea of retirement rob you of ministry. Your time has just begun. You are wise and you have time to pour into the younger generation.

When we stand before God a fire flames before us and this fire reveals what we have spent our time doing. Are we building the Kingdom? 1 Corinthians says that the worthless hours we spend on the hay, wood, and stubble will burn and what we spent time doing for the Kingdom will stand and we will be rewarded based on THAT!

You know, after reading this scripture, I think ....what an awe- struck honoring moment in the presence of my Father...... but also what a dreadful day that will be for me. I waste copious amounts of time building hay, wood, and stubble in my life. What about you?

1 Corinthians 3: 10-15

By the grace God has given me, I laid a foundation as a wise builder, and someone else is building on it. But each one should build with care. For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ. If anyone builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw, their work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each person’s work. If what has been built survives, the builder will receive a reward. If it is burned up, the builder will suffer loss but yet will be saved—even though only as one escaping through the flames.

Proverbs 16:31

Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained in the way of righteousness.


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