- Kelli Rae Wilson
teacher- child issues
I am hearing about many teacher-child issues lately, not specifically at my kids' school, but all around.
It’s true, there are just some kids who are more difficult than others. Some, more difficult, from how God made them and some are a product of how parents created them to be (not submissive to authority). Sometimes these issues create a conflict in school.
What makes a great parent, when it comes to a school issue, is the parent who can come alongside that difficult child's teacher.
It’s better to have your child's teacher in the same corner as you than to build a wall of defense.
It is better to have your child's teacher on the same page as you, and work together toward correcting your child's issues, than to get puffed-up with pride or have hurt feelings. In some cases there are 'teacher issues' and how we handle that as Christian parents says a lot too.
What good does it do to have resentment toward the people caring for our children? What do we do?
Pray without ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18)- God reveals truth on all circumstances to those who ask HIM! Sometimes the truth about our children hurts us too. You will be amazed what God does when we pray for these type of things! God could be saving our children from destruction. He knows what HE is doing. Why is it so hard for us to go to God FIRST? Because, as cliche’ as it sounds, the truth hurts. We like to resort to our own conclusions before we can seek ANYONE else's advice- even God’s! That’s sinful…don’t let pride win in your Godly mothering. Pray for yourself (first), your child (second) and teacher (third). Why in this order? Because, we are responsible for ourselves and our offspring, through word and action we are a representation of Christ.
Remember, the enemy is a prowling lion (1 Peter 5:8), he wants nothing more than to ruin our child's security. He wants our children to be prideful and to not be submissive to authority. If the enemy can get our children into a mode of being un-submissive to authority ---then the enemy wins- when those children become adults and they cannot figure out how to be submissive toward GOD (the ultimate Authority)! If our children know we side with the adult who takes care of them, often times, it builds "security" in our children. Whether the teacher is right or wrong, our assurance in a situation lessens any anxiety our children will have. Speak life to your children, this will also breaks walls of "defiance" that our children have built-up toward their teachers.
Sometimes, teachers are wrong. Most times momma does know best! Even more reason to stay connected with your child's teacher. Work together!! How we react is a reflection of Christ. The Fruits of The Sprit are a good reminder of how we handle ourselves as Christians. It’s easy to have the "good fruit" when times are easy. But, do we have The Fruit of The Spirt when times are hard?—that’s when it counts.
Gossip ruins everything (Ephesians 4:29). Your child hears you talk about their teacher either negatively or joyfully. **Never talk poorly about your child's teacher in front of them. They can hear you when you talk on the phone (be careful). When a child hears these negatives, what you are doing is then sending your child off into school with an automatic unnatural approach- either an “entitlement" or "insecurity" issue. Depending on the type of child issue you are having and what type of child personality you have- these are huge issues for children.
Parents hold the keys to fixing most problems. These are our children, not the schools, not the daycares, not the Sunday school class, not the youth pastor's. It's our job to fix it- no one else's.
• If abuse is taking place everything above is off limits. Your child should automatically be pulled from the adult. Do not allow your child to get a wounded spirit. The saying is," it’s easier to help a child than repair a broken man." It's true. There is a big difference between discipline and abuse.. Chose wisely on both ends. Both are pivotal points to ruining your children (lack of discipline or allowing abuse). Prayer- prayer- prayer!
Sometimes our children are wrong. While momma knows best…guess what..most times our children are wrong. They need to be discipled (to teach; train.). They were born not knowing..for a reason. that reason is so they could be discipled properly. EVEN if it’s not the way you would do it, your child could be wrong. That needs to be dealt with. I see many parents not ‘liking’ the way teachers handle discipline and then they disregard the sin in their child. That’s very dangerous. This is where entitlement comes into play. OUR WORLD IS FULL OF THIS! This is where you stay in the same corner as your teachers! There are ways to go about handling the partnership of discipline with the teachers, but your child is more than likely wrong. Be blessed, be humbled…..let your heart hurt..take a deep breath and know..our children need discipline. How we handle it, shows our children how to handle it.
In life, not all consequences or discipline are the same. In order to have humble children, they need to see humble parents. How we handle ourselves in difficult situations and with authority, is going to be how our children handle authority the rest of their lives. As Christian adults, we come to authority daily with our Savior. Teaching our kids this is key to their relationship with Christ.
Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you James 4:7
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Ephesians 4:29
Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8
Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-17
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.
If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit. Let us not become boastful, challenging one another, envying one another. Galatians 5:22